What Is The Total % Of The Earth’s Water?

Mr. X

Dear Mr. X,

Well, I appreciate your effort with this question. But in all honesty, it’s one of the most difficult questions to answer. You may be wondering why. Read the question again. Carefully now. Ok. Point proven. Now, let the Great Wimble give it a go.

Let’s get some facts straight. For starters, it is estimated that there is 326,000,000,000,000,000,000 gallons of water on Earth. That’s a lot of water. However, about 98% of that water is in the ocean, and undrinkable at this point in time. Almost 2% is fresh water. Of course that’s still a lot of water.

Now, I’m assuming that in your question, you wanted to know the percentage of water compared to land. Well, approximately 70% of the earths crust is covered in water.

However, if you look at your question another way, you may be interested in know how much of something is in the Earth’s water. However, you didn’t specify what that something is, which makes this question so difficult. In fact, even if you did, it’s nearly impossible to determine how much of that something is actually in the water, due to the fact that there’s so much of it.

Let me just say that there are lots of things in the oceans and lakes. You’ll find lots of pollution, some urine, some dead animals, and millions of other contaminants. However, keep in mind that the amount is small. In fact, if you even had 1 million gallons of urine in the lakes, you’re going to be plenty fine. Nothing to worry about. Of the 326,000,000,000,000,000,000 gallons of water on earth. 1,000,000 of that is practically nothing.

Hope I was able to help. Glad to hear from you again.

Wimble

Geez, I’ve started a trend with the “!” at the end of the name. O.K. here’s my question. What does “Wimble” really mean? It’s your alias name, I know, but what’s the true meaning of “Wimble”?

DP!

Dear DP!,

Yes, DP!, you have started somewhat of a trend. And there may be more to it than just the !. But I won’t go there. May be inappropriate for the young readers. I’m glad you asked this question. I’m sure many people are interested in know where my name came from and what it actually means.

“Wimble” is a nickname given to me by college friends. Some of you may already know the history behind it. I won’t go into detail, because one definition of Wimble is not appropriate. However, that was just a definition from the game Balderdash from one of my so called “friends”. How RUDE!!!

Anyway’s, the real definition is “a small tool used for boring”. (That’s boring holes, kind of like drilling, but bigger).

But the nickname did come from the game Balderdash. We were playing it one night, and I got bored, so I started making the definitions being other people. This word happened to be the definition that someone wrote about me. So, it stuck.

I will have to admit though, the nickname does make for a great “genius” name. Doesn’t it? Wimble. What is the first think that pops in your head when you read this? A genius? Or an idiot? Ok. I guess it’ll fit for both. I’ll let you decide

Hope I was able to help. Glad to hear from you again.

Wimble

why is it that the author of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams thought that the number 42 is known through out the world as the answer to the ultimate question of life the universe and everything?

-=\’ Fly ‘/=-

Dear -=\’ Fly ‘/=-,

This is an excellent question. Douglas Adams was one of the best authors of all time. Unfortunately, he lost his life at the young age of 49. Anyway, your question is very easy to answer for the Great Wimble.

Let me first answer your question, and then I will explain why 42 is so vastly important. If you were familiar with the many interviews that Adams gave throughout the years, you would know the answer. For starters, 42 is known throughout the world as the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe, and everything because of his series of books beginning with the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. Douglas, however, knew that this number was unimportant because it was merely just thought. It was merely a random answer to the ultimate question that he knew would confuse his readers.

Now, with the answer out of the way, let’s look at some reasons why 42 is the answer to the ultimate question, or is it?

If you really want to understand this answer, you must read this book. Otherwise, it may make little sense.

Adams stated in his book that the question, at one point, was 6 x 9. However, most people can determine that 6 x 9 does not actually equal 42. In all reality, it is equal to 54. Now, that would make one think that 42 is not the answer to the question 6 x 9. However, many people were able to realize that 6 x 9 DOES actually equal 42. That is in base 13. Only then is it equal to 42. However, this idea is thrown out the window when Adams stated the fact that anyone who makes jokes in base 13 should get help. Therefore, that disproves that 42 is the true answer to 6 x 9 as first concluded.

Now, let’s think about something. According to science, what made life, the universe, and everything? That’s quite simple. The Big Bang. Now, lets look at this a little closer. Lets look at the letters in the words BIG BANG. Ok, that was simple. Now, lets agree that A is the first letter in the alphabet, B is the second, etc. Therefore, A = 1, B = 2, and so on. Now, let’s look at the word in terms of numbers. 2 9 7 2 1 14 7. Now, add those numbers together, and what do you get? 42!!! So, perhaps the answer to the ultimate question is actually 42 which represent the Big Bang. Now that makes more sense. Especially considering the fact that Adams used the words Gnab Gib in his book (read it backwards).

So there’s your answer. When decoded, the answer to the ultimate question is the Big Bang.

I was just thinking. Why was President Clinton so popular? No, it’s not because of his “sexual relations with Miss Lewinsky”. In all reality it is because he was the 42nd President. See, 42 is popular. Just don’t try saying that Bill Clinton is the answer to the ultimate question. Cause that answer would actually be Lewinsky.

Wimble

Will my new book manuscript sell? will it make the NY Times best seller list? I know you have said that your not truly psychic, however you are the Great Wimble, so I suppose you of all people should know!

Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,

Well, I’m glad that you thought of me when it came to this question. Whenever a person writes a book, they always want to know if it will sell. Well, let the Great Wimble explain a few things when it comes to writing books.

You may spend years writing a book. Or, perhaps you wrote it overnight. Either way, there’s one thing you must realize. At least ONE person out there in this world will read your book. Just like the say when it comes to soul mates, there is always at least one soul mate for every person on earth. The same goes for books as well. There is always at least one “soul book reader” who will read your book. Now, chances are your soul book reader will purchase your book. How do I know this? Simple. They’re your soul book reader and love your book. Therefore they will buy it. That answers the first question. Yes, your book will sell.

Now, as far as “will it make the NY Times Best Seller List” goes, that’s a much tougher question. Now, since I’m not psychic, I don’t know what this book is about, or if it’s even well written. I’ll assume that it is well written. However, even knowing that, it’s very difficult to determine if it will make the list.

OH WAIT!!! Psychic experience coming… Oh my… OOOOHHH MY!!!! OH NO!!!… OH YES!!! Yep, just as I suspected. Yes, it will make the list. However, I am unable to determine where on the list it is located. And I’m not sure if it’ll be printed in the NY Times either. To say the least, you’re book will be on the list, just like every other book ever written and published. However, it may not make it high enough in the list to be printed in the NY Times.

Hope I was able to help and I wish the best of luck with your book. Hope to hear from you again, even though I won’t realize it.

Wimble

Why do men find it funny to crack corny jokes??? And then think that they are the funniest person alive when they do it..??

Novella=)

Dear Novella=),

I’m glad to hear from you again. Now, this question is fairly simple to answer. In fact, it’s so simple that I don’t understand why females don’t know the answer. Well, the Great Wimble will explain.

The reason why men find it funny to crack corny jokes is simply because men know the true meaning of humor. In fact, one main reason why men find these questions funny is simply because women don’t understand. Or perhaps they’re unable to comprehend their complexity.

Let’s take a look at a sample:

What did the monster eat after it had its teeth pulled?
The dentist!

Now don’t tell me that you don’t find that humorous… I mean, seriously. If you find my answers humorous then that “corny” joke MUST be just absolutely hilarious.

There’s also another possible explanation. Ever since the beginning of time, women have always thought of men as inferior. DON’T LIE!!! JUST ADMIT IT!!! You, growing up with your parents, have learned to think of men the same as they did, who learned it from their parents, and so on. Because of this accusation, you look down on men and don’t want to admit that these jokes are humorous.

Hope I was able to help. Next time be a little easier on the men. There’s more to us than your ancestors may have told you.

Wimble

How is an ABC titration performed, and what significance does it hold in the pulp and paper industry?

TAPPI Man

Dear TAPPI Man,

This is an excellent question. Many people don’t realize how these types of tests can help in the pulp and paper industry. The Great Wimble is here to make these things more clear.

For starters, the ABC titration is more commonly known as AB titration (Acid-Base titration). The procedure can be quite confusing for those who are unfamiliar with titration. You first must get the sample that you are testing for acidity and it must be diluted. Add a few drops of phenolphthalein indicator. Then, most commonly, you place Sodium Hydroxide (NaOH) into a buret. You then begin titrating the NaOH into the diluted sample. If the sample is acidic, there will be no discoloration in the sample. NaOH is added into the sample until there is a permanent pink color to the sample. This represents that the sample is now neutral (or close to).

How is this test significant in the pulp and paper industry? Well, let’s look at it this way. Let’s say you buy a package of manila folders from the store. Now, let’s say that you store your VERY important paperwork in these folders. If the folders are too acidic or too basic, then the folders will cause the contents to deteriorate at a much faster pace than if it were neutral. In other words, instead of the paper lasting for a hundred years or more, it only ends up lasting five years. Let’s just hope that your important papers aren’t the only copy, otherwise you’d be out of luck in five years.

Hope I was able to help with your question. Remember to make sure your folders aren’t too acidic. Bad things may result. Hope to hear from you again.

Wimble

In the show “Empty Nest”, what character does Laverne sell her truck to?

Mitch

Dear Mitch,

This is one of my most favorites shows of all time. This questions brings back many memories to the Great Wimble. We won’t go there.

Empty Nest was on the air from October 1988 to July 1995 and aired on NBC. It was a spinoff of the show Golden Girls. The character Laverne Todd was played by Park Overall. She was nominated for Golden Globes in 1991, 1992, and 1993 for playing this character.

Now, the episode that you happen to be talking about was episode #155 which first aired on December 17, 1994. In this episode, Laverne sold her truck to the character named Dr. Maxine Douglas played by Marsha Warfield. Oh, I remember this episode as if it were yesterday. Poor Laverne, she missed her beloved truck so much.

Hope I was able to answer your question. Thanks, and hope to hear from you again.

Wimble

What is a Lepper Whore and how do you get one?

RENNE LYN PENNY!!

Dear RENNE LYN PENNY!!,

Let me start by saying that I’m glad at least one of us can spell our names. Now, let’s move on. Let me point out that you actually mean Leper Whore. It’s an excellent question, none the less, and the Great Wimble has an answer.

Now, what is a leper whore? Well, that’s simple really. It’s someone who is infected with leprosy who likes to disobey their quarantine and give the disease to others. Talk about generosity. Is anyone that generous?

Fortunately, the disease is much more controlled nowadays. Approximately 520,000 people across the globe are infected with leprosy. Of this 520,000, I’m willing to bet that only about 0.1% are actually leper whores. So that’s only about 520 leper whores. Now, here’s the problem. Due to the low number of leper whores, it’s extremely difficult to actually find one. However, these tips may help in the search. Leper whores like to hang out in public places. Shopping malls and concerts are popular. This way they can be generous to hundreds of other people.

So, how do you get a leper whore? Go look in your local K-Mart or Walmart. There’s bound to be one there.

Hope I was able to help and I would love to hear from you again.

Wimble

What U.S. State Is The largest?

Texas Or Alaska?

~Mr. X

Dear ~Mr. X,

Gotta say, I love the tilde. Great addition to the mysterious name. Now this question, can be quite simple. Of course, the answer depends on how you look at it. Let’s look at it a couple ways.

For starters, Alaska is, by far, the larger state in terms of the land area. Texas is a mere 260,000 square miles, while Alaska more than doubles that at about 650,000 square miles. That’s a lot of land… Alaska is about one fifth the size of the continental United States.

Now, let’s look at it in terms of population. In this case, Texas is the winner. In fact, Alaska doesn’t even stand a chance against Texas in this case. Alaska has an estimated population of about 640,000 people. Texas, on the other hand, exceeds it by more than 30 times that of Alaska. Texas has an estimated 21.8 Million people. That’s quite the difference. Can you imagine having approximately 1 square mile all to yourself? Wouldn’t that be just fantastic? All that space, you could do anything. You could put multiple theme parks in that space!! Unfortunately for Texans, they only get a mere 7 or 8 acres each. Poor Texans.

So, in the end, the answer to your question is BOTH!! Alaska is larger than Texas AND Texas is larger than Alaska.

Hope I was able to help ya out. Keep being your little mysterious self.

Wimble

Why is Torch Lake so clear and clean?

Michelle

Dear Michelle, again,

I’m glad to hear from you again. This question has been the only question so far that has actually extremely confused me. See, here’s the thing. You’re not very descriptive in your question. For starters, I know of three Torch Lakes. Two in Michigan, and one in Wisconsin. I’m sure there’s many others, but I didn’t have the time to look those up. I’ll consider the two lakes in Michigan since I know them the best.

Now, here’s the main problem. The two lakes that are located in Michigan are nowhere near each other, and are complete opposites. One of which is located near Houghton, MI. This lake is one of the dirtiest in the world. The other lake, which is located in Antrim County, MI, is one of the cleanest in the world. Now, I don’t know what you think of that, but I see something wrong. How can two Torch Lakes be complete opposites?? You would think they would have named them something different, if they aren’t even similar. But, oh well, nothing you can do now.

Now, I’m assuming that you’re talking about the Torch Lake in Antrim County, since it’s actually clean and clear. Well, the answer to your question is quite simple. Over the years, there has been very little pollution put into the lake. As a result, the lake has remained clear and clean. The other Torch Lake, on the other hand, has had extreme amounts of pollution which resulted in what we have today.

That’s the only real answer to your question. Little pollution. Hope I was able to help.

Wimble